July 19th, 2010
If you think about it, it will drive you nuts. More people get into trouble by assuming incorrectly what another person is thinking, whether it be about their appearance, their position on a given subject or about their character in general.
The brain is an amazing control room that regulates every aspect of our body, including maintenance of itself. But beyond the around-the-clock internal life support system, the brain processes thoughts associated with innumerable intake sources involving smell, taste, touch, sight and sound. Most of these generate pleasant or unpleasant responses, and many are used to protect the body as well as to nourish it.
A great part of our brain activity, however, is centered on interpreting communication using sight and sound. Reading something causes us to judge it for accuracy or fairness, or even to compare it to our own life experiences. Seeing things, be it real life or reproduced life, evokes similar responses. Touch is added for emphasis, whether it be intimate, directive or hostile.
Basic human nature is that, upon meeting someone, we assess who they are and how we feel about them. This relationship can progress either personally or as additional information is fed to us about the person or group. As we get to know someone, we begin to build an expectation of how that person will react to what we say and do. This is not a bad thing, necessarily, but can eventually cause a relationship to become stale or to deteriorate.
The greatest danger in communication is to presuppose what a person is thinking or how he/she will react. And most of us do it. Communication begins to breakdown when either party is offended about being second-guessed.
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July 12th, 2010
The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.
When President Roosevelt (FDR) spoke these words at his inaugural address, the country was at the bottom of the Great Depression. He went on to describe fear as the “nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance.”
We all have fears, some more than others. Even those who appear to be fearless are, in reality, able to keep their fears in check. The causes of fear are endless, from ablutophobia (fear of washing or bathing) to zoophobia (fear of animals). I recently confirmed that I have a touch of claustrophobia when I visited an inmate at the county jail. Entering into a small, locked room, I spoke with him through a glass and telephone. Ten minutes into the conversation I got dry mouth and had to pee. And I still had 50 minutes to go before they would let me out!
The Bible documents a number of instances involving the fear of men, animals and elements. Jesus said that we should not fear men, but rather “fear him who, after the killing of the body, has power to throw you into hell.” (Luke 12:5) My fundamentalist friends assure me that the verse doesn’t mean that we should be afraid of God; we should respect him and recognize his awesome power — a sort of healthy fear of him.
While I recognize God’s omnipotence (the power to do anything he wants), I would rather approach him as my perfect Father, the one whom I can run to, and cling to, the one whom I trust to rout my fears. Oftentimes I get comfort when, faced with a fear, I cry silently to him, “Your will be done.”
I suspect that I will never achieve fearlessness this side of death, but my hope is that I am approaching it, ever so slowly, and will overcome it, even if it be at the other side of death on my continued journey.
Another thing that helps me is the thought that others are facing greater challenges than I, and that when I reach the other side of the fearful event, I wonder why I should have feared it at all.
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July 1st, 2010
Okay, so the Unitarian thing didn’t work out. It might have been the email I received, inviting me to the Heathen Hoopla, where I was to dress as the god, goddess or demon of my choice and bring something to beat on as I dance around the campfire — in the middle of summer!
When we went the first Sunday, we were asked by the greeters to not judge them too quickly on just one service. That should have been a clue. I gave them three services. So when I suggested to my wife that this may not be right for us, she was greatly relieved because she felt the same.
I was trying to pinpoint what was so uncomfortable about my brief Unitarian Universalist experience. While we were encouraged (in their literature) to share what we believe, we found that no one there was sharing what they believed. They seemed to almost bend over backward in their political correctness with regard to religious tolerance.
I know what I believe. God, Jesus, Holy Spirit. These were being replaced with Mother Earth, heathen hoopla and humanism. While I applaud their emphasis on human kindness and expressions of love, the concentrated effort to avoid references to God, Jesus and Holy Spirit were uncomfortable.
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June 7th, 2010
Not sure. For a few weeks my wife and I have visited a local Unitarian Universalist (UU) church with the goal of establishing a communicative link with someone other than ourselves. The reason we have selected a church atmosphere over any other venue is because of our faith. We are followers of Christ, but our peculiar form of doctrine (or lack thereof) makes us not quite comfortable with the plethora of churches available — both denominational and non-denominational (which is really just a title; they mirror other denominations).
Our spiritual journey has been both exciting and somewhat lonely. We were steeped in Christian fundamentalism, but after 35 or so years of our married walk together, we began to question some of our doctrine. Like the validity or purpose of the Rapture and Tribulation, how the world will end (if it ends) and why is an eternal torture in a burning hell necessary?
We started taking Jesus at his word. He prayed to God and called him his father, so we wondered how he could be God at the same time. Sure, he said “my father and I are one,” but that could just mean that they were of the same mind, like “my father and I are just alike.” So there goes the trinity.
And we struggled to find definite comments or teaching from the Son of God to support the main stream salvation/end times position that so many promote. The only thing that we could come up with is that Jesus wants us to be nice (pardon the oversimplification).
We went from organized church to house church to no church. We tried a couple of Methodist churches because they seemed rather innocuous. But we felt that getting involved outside of worship service might put us in a position of revealing our beliefs, thereby making us and them uncomfortable. Our next stop - the Unitarian Universalists.
We had done some research on the UUs and learned that they were tolerant of all religions and were big on encouraging human kindness. So far, so good. We have attended three “worship” services: one on remembering UUs who have passed on; one on doing your own thing; and the last one could have been titled, “Is is possible that I’m a humanist?”
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June 2nd, 2010
What’s with the Jesus in the bathtub?
When spring arrived in our area, the leaves budded, the flowers bloomed and a new crop of bathtub shrines appeared. And we’re in the heart of the Bible Belt — not that many Catholics to speak of. Now, if you haven’t seen them, they usually are placed in the front yard for street view. They are full sized bathtubs that are submerged in the soil, vertically, half way, with a figurine placed in the center. This configuration is in the form of a grotto, which is an Italian word for “cave.” Flowers and landscaping are added to some.
The primary figure is the Virgin Mary, but around here there seems to be more figures of Jesus, maybe because we are in the Bible Belt. Sometimes they will substitute Mother or Son with their favorite saint. I don’t recall seeing anyone bowing before the tub in worship, so I’m not quite sure what the purpose is in having them. And using a bathtub seems, well, tacky. You would think the Son of God, or his Mom, would rate something better.
Perhaps the tub talisman is a visual reminder that we are to come clean. No hidden sins or secrets. No unclean living or soiled spirituality. Many religions use such reminders in order to stay focused, so I’m not knocking it. However, I think the best reminder is to be in each others lives, intimately, bearing one another’s burdens and teaching by example.
While there are no Biblical references to Jesus bathing, he was certainly no stranger to water. He was baptized in it, walked on it, calmed it and changed it into wine. One time he used a basin to wash his disciples’ feet (John 13:5). They didn’t seem to understand why he was doing it, but he basically told them that they would figure it out later. Some folks today have made it into a ritual, but I’m not so sure that they have really figured it out.
Peter saw the event as a service performed by a lowly servant. So when Jesus came to him, he refused, apparently feeling that the Messiah should not stoop so low. Jesus gently rebuked him, saying that such a refusal would eliminate Peter from service in the Kingdom of God. Peter’s dramatic response was, “Don’t stop with my feet!”
Such passages are subject to personal interpretation. Here’s mine.
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